Dena Tyson Fans

I woke up about 2:30 this morning; I was having a bad dream and couldn’t get back to sleep. I guess I was too overstuffed from the dinner we had.

Since I couldn’t sleep I turned on the t.v. and lied on my stomach with my eyes closed and listened, hoping I’d soon dose off.

So this program I was listening to, (and this is my interpretation) was all about the booty, one of those infomercials. They were talkin ‘bout these jeans and how they gave them a “sho-nuff booty” ok…?

Now I ain’t tryin ‘ta say we got the fix on booty alright, so don’t be getting all mad and stuff. Speaking of my other sisters out there and you know I got much love for you, y’all done come a long way since you’ve been workin out and stuff. Throw some collard greens and cornbread in the mix with a few neck bones and you’ll be good ‘ta go …so stay cool.

They had a few women talkin ‘bout what they had on and how their jeans made them look like they had nuthin goin on in the rear. Then I heard the woman say “go and try these on and see how you feel.” After a few seconds they would come back grinning and cheesing about how great they felt and too excited about the booty. Y’all know what I was laying there thinking right…? So they went on and on, couldn’t talk about it enough.

I never looked up still I just kept lying there on my tummy with my eyes shut and listened. The next voice I heard was a sistah talkin ‘bout how upset she was with her current jeans and how they did nothing for her. Said she needed something that would accent her assets. (like I said, my interpretation)

Now you know you don’t even have to look at a person to be able to tell what they look like sometimes, and I knew just by listening to her she had plenty booty. The way she spoke about it just cracked me up though. I was saying to myself, goan and make that money gurl, easy money, sell it, ok…? Then she went and put the jeans on. She came back popping her lips grinning like buckey beaver and said “ooooo… I never looked like this before, I love it… shootz I look good… I got a booty and it really shows.” Y’all know I had to turn over and get my glasses so I could see what the deal was with these jeans.

First of all …dem jeans did not give her all that booty she had back there. OMG I was crackin up! She couldn’t stop posing and turning and when she turned around I noticed something a little different. They were showing pics of before and after and comparing the pics with the others and how they made them look and I realized the back pockets on her jeans were up to her waist, where as the pockets on the other girl’s jeans was raised but not quite as high.

Lawd ham-mercy I fell out laughing!! She done told the secret! The trick to the jeans is this… “pocket placement” you place the pockets high on a non-booty and you got the illusion of booty, you place the pockets high on existing booty and the backka ‘yo jeans looks like two eyebrows raised in the “huh...?” position . -- Oh my goodness I was crackin up! Every time she turned around her booty was like “ … huh, we on camera?” lol, lol, lol

Needless to say I really couldn’t get back to sleep and today I am pretty tired. My work never stops and I gotta get back to it!

Take it easy people, make the most of your day.

~Holla!